The crying lady

It was just a brief glimpse.
We were riding the skytrain from our house to our school. As we passed station after station, the doors of the train opened and closed in their usual fashion.
I was enjoying watching the scenery out the window. It was almost mesmerizing taking in the beautiful landscape.
But as we came to a train stop and the doors opened, I just happened to glance out the door and notice a woman.
The thing that caught my attention about this lady was that she had very light and long blonde hair. I haven't seen any light-haired people since being in this country, so she stood out.
This blonde lady was professionally dressed. She stood with her back to me, but she looked classy and as if she had it all going for her - just by her outward appearance and demeanor.
Then in a brief flash, the blonde lady turned her head and I saw that she was crying.
I could tell that she was trying to hold it all in and avoid drawing attention to herself, but the tears were streaming down her face. She was wiping the tears from her eyes with her fingertips.
Almost as quick as this sight unfolded before my eyes, the doors of the train closed and we were moving on...

Throughout the day, the image of this crying woman stayed with me. It almost haunted me in a way.
"Why was she crying?"
"Why was she hurting?"
"What was going on in her life to bring her to the point that she was standing alone at a train station pouring tears?"
These were some of the thoughts that kept ringing in my mind.

The truth is, there are a lot of people in this world that are hurting. For some like this crying lady, it's visible. You can see their pain.
For others, it's hidden below the surface and behind a mask of well-being.
Most are just desperate for a shoulder to cry on, to know that someone out there cares, and they seek some relief from the burden they bear.

As children of a great Dad, we carry around in us the hope and love that these hurting people need.
The crying lady was an inspiration to me that Dad wants us to be intentional about sharing His spirit with whomever we meet.
I am reminded of a favorite phrase that encourages us as brothers and sisters, like-minded children of Dad, that when we face difficulties our burdens are diminished because our burdens are shared but likewise when there are blessings our joy is doubled.
May you help to diminish the burdens of others and be doubled over with abundant joy!

Hellos and Goodbyes

As a perfectionist with control tendencies, I like to be prepared. 

That's why, prior to coming to the ILC, I did as much research and planning as possible to help our family with the adjustment and transition involved with leaving our home and moving to someplace far, far away.

We researched our future home environment. We sold things. (A lot of things.) We moved out of our house. We said goodbye to beloved careers. We spent time with family, friends and were very intentional about making the most of our fleeting time in South Mississippi.

That's why when we arrived in Virginia, I felt confident and assured of our surroundings. I felt like we had things we needed for our utility and comfort. In other words, I felt ready for the next step.

Boy was I blown away...

Our training has been intense, but that's been ok. I know it's worthwhile and beneficial for successful strategies overseas. We've been stretched and challenged - still ok with all that - I expected that would be the case. We've tried new foods, we've been immunized, and we've learned a lot. None of that rocked my boat, even though some of those situations have been a little, uh, challenging.

What I wasn't prepared for and didn't expect was just how close I would get with some of the other people living here. I never thought relationships would develop so fast that complete strangers would become family in just a matter of weeks.

But that is what happened.

I've developed a new name here, and it's one I wouldn't change for anything in the world. That name is "Mom." 

Now I know what you're thinking. I've got two daughters who have been calling me Mom for years. But now I've got an additional 7 daughters and 1 son that call me Mom. 

The funny thing is, these kids are only 10-15 years younger than me. 

This morning, one of these daughters said to me, "Mom. I love that you love us like one of your own children."

To which I responded, "Well, actually, I love you more like a big sister cause I'm NOT AS OLD AS YOU THINK I AM!!"

We had a good laugh. And it was funny. But her words meant a lot to me.

Not just because I knew they were sweet words from her heart, but because it meant she felt the same way as I do. We're close. We're family. And that's the way I feel about all these SEAP kids of mine.

But then there are the other relationships we've built with other people outside of our Southeast Asian affinity. 

There are some families here who we have bonded with, our children have bonded with their children, and now that we're facing more goodbyes, well, it just breaks my heart.

This last week of training kinda snuck up on me (when did anything start sneaking up on Mrs. Prepared?) and now we're stressing, trying to spend as much time with these people as possible. 

We're frantically trying to get everyone's email address and Skype address so that we can stay in touch in the coming months and years. The likelihood of being back together with all these same people at the same time is pretty much an impossible concept. (Although, all things are possible in the Master's plan.) 

Can I just tell you how thankful I am for this surprise, this blessing really, that is new friends and family? I've been told by predecessors and mentors along the way that The Big Guy is in control and He will provide family for us when our blood-kin is far away. I never doubted that He would, but to really experience it - well, I'm just not sure I can describe how humbling and yet overflowing it makes me feel.

Yes, these last few days are going to be a little sad, but I know it's because I've loved and received love that I never expected or hoped for. 

The cool thing is... I know there's even more to come! Ooh eee that makes me excited. :) Who needs prepared when Father is in control? 

Be imitators of the Master, therefore as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as He loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice. - 10th book of the second half of the good book, the first couple lines of the 5th section :)

Rock My World!

Tuesday had already been an emotionally exhausting morning as we sat and listened to story after story of persecution and warfare that is going on among the Master's people in foreign places. Many stories moved us to tears. It had been a challenging, humbling and inspiring day. 

After a short break for lunch, we came back to our meeting room for one more hour-long lecture. Still a little dazed and glassy-eyed, I sat down to try to focus on the current speaker.

Our meeting room is an open auditorium filled with a little more than 30 small, white conference tables and red, padded chairs where we all sit - about 150 adults or so. The table where CJ and I normally sit is in the front row, although this day, our front row table was on the end, closest to the exit door. 

I was sitting at our table with my usual surroundings: my Macbook, my cup of coffee, my copy of the Good Book, a notebook, pen, etc. 

About halfway through the current session, a low rumbling noise started reverberating throughout our auditorium. I turned and looked at CJ sitting to my right. "What is that?" I whispered.

All of a sudden the walls around us started shaking and the ground beneath our feet was vibrating. All of my stuff on the table started shifting around.

Pause time here for a second as a multitude of thoughts flashed through my mind… 

"Is this the end time? No, we're all still here."

"Is Hurricane Irene already here? No, it's too soon for that."

"Could it be a tornado? No, it's a beautiful sunny and perfect day outside."

"It's too much noise and vibration to be a plane passing overhead. What in the world could this be?!?!"

As mass confusion set in among our group, our guest speaker excitedly announced, "It's an earthquake! Get out of the building!"

CJ was already out of his seat and heading toward the door when he turned around to me and said, "Grab your computer!" He had his in his hands. (You notice his priorities) :)

I turned back around to our table and noticed that the people who had been sitting with us were on their hands and knees under the table where we had just been sitting.

I grabbed my computer and said, "Ya'll come on! The door [leading outside] is right here!"

We were running out the door within probably 30 seconds of when the commotion began. As I cleared the doorway I heard a voice on a loudspeaker say, "Evacuate the building! Evacuate the building!"

I could feel the heat from the sun on my arms and face as we busted through the door. It was one of the most beautiful days outside we have experienced on campus, but in the most unsettling fashion, the ground that we were standing on was still shaking.

It was all over in just 45 seconds, but it seemed like many minutes.

I had no more let out a sigh of relief that it was over and we were ok, when I looked at CJ and gasped, "The girls!"

The building where the girls go to school each day is very close to the building where we have our classes, about a fifty yards away. But I had exited our building on the farthest side away from their school. 

With my computer in arms, I took off running towards the girls' school, passing through all the other people who had evacuated out of ours.

When I caught my first glimpse of their school, I couldn't see any of the children. I ran around to the back of their building where over some high hedges I could see them all huddled in a group.

When I finally saw Zoë and noticed that she was crying, I ran right through the middle of the sticker bushes to get to her quickly. 

I wrapped my arms around her and held her tight. After a few moments, I looked down at her and said, "That was really cool, huh?"

"No!" she said. "I didn't like it."

I would later learn that she was in the children's library when the earthquake began. When the book shelves started rocking and knick-knacks on top started falling off, she became frightened like I think any grown adult would. 

Her teacher who had been waiting in the hall called for the children to come out of the library and go to the bathroom for safety. Apparently because she was in shock, she felt kinda stuck in her place in the library and couldn't move. It was a friend who yelled at her, "Zoë! Move it!" that she finally came running out of the room. As she was running towards the bathroom, the loudspeaker announced for everyone to evacuate the building.

By the time I got to her, she was still shaking. 

But later, when the kids were returning to their classroom when the all clear was given, I heard her whisper to a friend, "That was so cool!" :)

She was ok and it was a good learning experience for what will likely be something we experience from time to time.

Miá happened to be riding in a van on the way home from a field trip to the zoo when the earthquake occurred. They never felt a thing and didn't even know it had happened. When her class returned to school and I picked her up at the end of the day, she had no idea what she had missed.

Later that evening when an aftershock shook, she was running across a soccer field and still didn't feel it. I said, "did you feel it?"

"Feel what?" she said.

Oh well…. nevermind.

When cell phones and internet finally came back, we learned that the earthquake was a 5.8 on the Richter scale with an epicenter only 30 miles from where we sat in our classroom. It was also the largest magnitude earthquake endured by the East Coast since World War II. Not so shabby…

In the end, it's the training time that has rocked my world more than any occurrence in nature. We've been stretched, pushed, challenged, inspired and motivated. And when the earth is shaking, it's good to know that our Boss is holding us right in the palm of His hand. He's holding us. We're holding our MacBooks. :) No, wait. Let me say that again.

He's holding us and we hold the desire to tell others who've never heard about the One who holds it all.

What are you holding on to today?

Cake does a body good!

This past week has been crazy intense!  Classes studying all types of theories and doctrine and beliefs mixed in with education overload on taxes, insurance, finances and computer technology. My little brain was so full, by Friday I felt that it might explode.

Saturday, on our day off, CJ and I took the girls to the “Quilting Quad” where I thought some mindless function would ease the stress of the week. Only there I was confronted with my own weakness and inability and helplessness. This was my first time to ever sit in front of a sewing machine. It would also be my last. (The girls did end up with some really cute purses – homemade!)

We also experienced a difficult loss this week when CJ’s grandmother, Mama Johnson, passed away. Married to Daddy Joe for 74 years, at age 89, she was the Johnson family matriarch. She made every child, grandchild and great-grandchild feel like the most important to her, and she could best be described by the love she showed to others. Her absence from our lives leaves a cold corner where her warmth and love once overflowed.

Overall, this has been a really tough week…

But…

We have felt your words to the father on our behalf. I hope you know how unbelievably important that is to us and how much we covet that expression from you.

There were a few really cool things that happened this week. A good friend that’s here on our campus took some family pictures for us to use in some of our promotional materials. I have to admit, I was kinda dreading this because the last time we had family pictures made, well, let’s just say it was not a good experience. But this friend was absolutely amazing and patient with us. Despite the fact that we were sweating like pigs in the blazing Virginia evening humidity, she made it so much fun, and the pictures turned out great!

I also had a visit from my Chi Omega little sister, Mary, and her husband, Larry, who happen to live down the road a couple hours. Seeing her was definitely a bright spot during a very challenging week.

But in the words of Zoë, “It’s a miracle!” that happened today. We’re very fortunate to live in a place where they have an amazing cafeteria that provides awesome meals for us everyday, but they don’t allow us any desserts or carbonated beverages. At the end of a long and grueling week, worn by the trials of learning and loss, miraculously in the cafeteria today after lunch, they put out a table with pound cake, warm strawberry and blueberry toppings, whipped cream and chocolate syrup! You would’ve thought they had set out a table with a million dollars on it by the way everyone went crazy over this special DESSERT! It was awesome.

We’re still really at the beginning of our training. I know there are a lot more experiences and challenges and miracles yet to come. I never expected this would be an easy process, and I never guessed where some of our joys would come from. Turns out it’s a piece of cake! (Get it? Cake!)

Keep looking up!

"I AM" by Zoë

Zoë wrote this poem in class yesterday. I thought it was pretty awesome and wanted to share...

I am crazy and left-handed.
I wonder if people have a good time with me.
I hear my little sister's voice.
I see my friends and family.
I want to be awesome.
I am crazy and left-handed.

I pretend to be extraordinary.
I feel like G*d loves me.
I touch my Ipod touch.
I worry about nothing.
I cry when I have to leave friends.
I am crazy and left-handed.

I understand G*d's holy word.
I say I am a TCK.
I dream about elephants.
I try to include others.
I hope for a good life when I grow up.
I am crazy and left-handed.

Getting settled and started

This is going to be a learning process... blogging about life without being too specific about life. If you've read this blog before you understand where I'm coming from. If this is your first time here, well, you'll just have to be in the dark.
We finally made it to Virginia. After two years of preparing for this transition, it's a little hard to believe that  we're actually here. But we are! It's absolutely beautiful, and I hope to post photos real soon so that you can see it.
We are living in a "quad" which has a shared living area and small attached apartments. Yesterday after arriving we were so excited to meet the six other people sharing our building for the next couple months. Six girls and our family make up quad #22 which is pretty cool, because it's centrally located on our campus to all our activities and meetings. The girls' school is right behind us and the cafeteria is just across the lawn - woo hoo!
Speaking of the girls... they have made friends lightning fast (as expected.) We went to get a sneak peek of their classrooms yesterday and it almost looked a little bit like Disney World with all the cool stuff they had there. Also being the only kids in our quad, they are getting a lot of attention from the other girls in #22. And they are loving it already.

We know that we are blessed beyond measure. We feel unbelievably grateful to be here and on this journey. We miss our friends and family at home, but we are excited for the new family we will be a part of here as well.

Stay tuned for pictures - soon - I promise. Keep looking up!

A breakdown in communications

For someone who has spent their life in the communications business, this "going off the grid" has been quite a challenge for me.
My accounts on Facebook, Twitter and all kinds of social media are now drastically different. Even this website has endured some serious alterations. But by far, the most difficult aspect of this transitioning process has been giving up my cell phone. Well, I still have a cell phone for two more weeks, but my smartphone is no longer smart. It's just for talking and texting.
I can't tell you how many times I've gone to eat at Azteca and wanted to "check-in" on Facebook, but couldn't. I just don't have that capability anymore, and I feel a little like I've lost connections with my friends and family.
A little funny... this week while we were visiting family in South Florida, my kind brother-in-law, Joe, would periodically hand me his cell phone and say, "Here. Tweet something. I know you want to."

At the end of this month, my cell phone will go away altogether.
Oh, CJ will still have his cell - at least through the end of September (while we're in Virginia.) And ironically enough, so will my oldest daughter since her phone is part of his account. But not me...
I know this is just all a part of a process, and when I look at the bigger picture, I think, how important is having a cell phone really? There are more difficult challenges endured by people in the world for sure.

Lately, I've been trying to think of it this way: An ice sculptor first starts with a block of ice. He chips away a little piece here and there til he creates his artwork. Likewise, I know that in order to be used for the Master, I have to have pieces of me chipped away. The goal is to become what my creator wants me to be so that I might be used by Him. I'm not melting, I'm just changing.

I know there will be many more changes in the near future as our family learns to live within a completely different culture. And I know that not being able to communicate like we do in this country is just the tip of the iceberg.

Speaking of communication, we'll be in Virginia for eight weeks and we'll be able to receive mail there - the old fashioned kind - and we'd love to hear from you! Cards, letters, care packages (hint, hint) can be sent to us at:
CJ, Julie, Zoë and Miá Johnson
c/o International Learning Center
16492 MLC Lane
Rockville, VA 23146