It's taken me 20 years to get here

I must be crazy.

I live in a third-world country with not-great electricity and even worse internet, yet I’ve just started working on my Masters degree via an online, distance-learning program. What was I thinking?!?!

I am now officially a student at Southeastern Bap. Theo. Sem. (yes, that’s a lot of abbreviations, but the little internet we have is monitored by local govt. authorities, so it’s best to be cautious.)

Another reason why I must have been crazy to think I could do an online program for a religious degree in a place that doesn’t allow such business.

Not to mention that I already have a two full-time jobs including homeschooling my two daughters and working as a Ch. Planter in an unreached and lost city. Oh and just living in a challenging, cross-cultural environment with few conveniences or comforts to make life a little easier eats up a chunk of my time. Where am I supposed to find these extra 20 hours per week needed to read, study, listen to lectures and write papers?

Now that you know I’ve completely lost my mind, I’ll try to explain how I entered into such a situation.

It’s simple, actually.

This past winter, when our family returned to America for a period of Stateside assignment, we spent some time reflecting on the previous three years living in Southeast Asia and praying about Father’s direction for the future.

One of the issues I kept bumping up against was my own lack of Biblical training.

Sure, I’ve read the Good Book. I’ve studied it and memorized portions of it. I know the stories in it pretty well. I’ve even taught Sunday School. I’ve “shared” with people all over the world, and this organization that we work for seems to approve of my capabilities. But now that I find myself teaching and training new believers and working to start new house groups, I feel the need to be able guide and instruct them with a broader understanding of theological concepts.

All that was going on in the back of my head when a friend of mine who visited us in Mississippi mentioned about all the online opportunities for graduate degrees these days. I had never even thought it would be a possibility to attend graduate school since we live on the far side from any schools that I would possibly want to attend.

But I started praying about it.

Would it even be possible?

And then I checked into it.

The people I spoke with really wanted to help me.

I researched and prayed a little more.

And I felt Father speaking to me.

So I went and talked to my pastor.

Of course he’s gonna be for it, right?

I talked with my parents.

I talked with my mother-in-law.

I talked with my kids.

Everyone seemed to think it would be great.

As for CJ, well, he seems to be getting a real kick out knowing what challenges lie ahead that he’s already experienced.

I keep trying to remind him of the many times and ways I helped him when he was doing it almost 20 years ago.

It’s hard to believe it’s been 20 years since I graduated with my Bachelors degree from Samford in 1995. It’s amazing how many things you forget in that long period of time.

Things like… how to study or how to write a paper. And I don’t just mean a news story or a blog. I mean like a 20 page research paper using Turabian style – whatever that is. Apparently it’s required that you use five syllable words in every sentence too.

I thought I would start easy with some intro level courses examining the O.T. or history of the Bap. Ch. or the like. But when I went to register for my classes, those courses were already full. So the classes I was able to get into are deeper and more intense. In other words, no one else wanted to take these classes either. But they are required; so I figured might as well get them out of the way. I know I’m going to learn a lot, and I know the end result will be so worth it.

But I keep finding myself thinking, “Why God?”

“Why this?”

“Why now?”

He keeps answering, “Just trust in me.”

I’m nervous.

Nervous may even be an understatement.

I’m waaaaaaay out of my comfort zone. (That’s a five syllable word, by the way.)

I have no confidence in myself that I’ll actually be able to pull this off.

But then I guess that means I’ll just have to depend on Him.

I’ve been memorizing some verses these days in our local language. The one I’m working on this week comes from the second book of Timothy. It’s the first chapter, verse seven. The passage tells us that He did not give us a spirit of timidity, but instead He gives us a spirit of power and of love and self-discipline.

Self-discipline? Check.

Love? Sure, most days.

It’s the “power” part where I need His indwelling.

Honestly, I’m so thankful for this opportunity. And I’m really praying that this educational endeavor will ultimately benefit the work we’re trying to do here.

Would you pray for that too?

Would you pray that I’m able to balance all the things in my already-busy schedule and prioritize according to His plan?

Would you pray that I could actually do this without really embarrassing myself, my family and my church?

Would you pray that all this is for His glory?

Ok, now who wants to proof-read my 20 page paper? J